This black acid rain keeps falling
as the ringing phone keeps calling
me to answer it as if it was most important at this time?
But if i were to answer the call
would you say you'd be home next fall
or would it be another salesman saying please ma'am, hold the line?
I reach for it and my heart stops beating
and though i know the moment is just fleeting
i pick it up and say hello and hope you'll be there, too.
and i hear your breath catch in your throat
and you clear your voice as i hear you choke
on words youve been dreaming in your head like "i've been thinking of you."
and soon enough we cut like knives
thru broken hearts and broken lives
and once again i want to scream at everything you stand for
but how can i when i see that face
and touch your perfect warm embrace
i guess its all that i can do to show you to the door.
so i hang up the phone in my own spite
and kiss my photo of you goodnight
and wish you'll call again when i'm in better spirits.
so i guess we'll talk tomorrow
and you'll have all new sorrows
but truth be told im sick of this and i dont want to hear it.
I sat in the window and counted the raindrops that fell on your sunset hair and wondered how i could change this whole mess to fit my perspective of what is and what isnt and so much isnt but more is and everytime i hear you breathe its all i can do not to cry and dissolve into the holy waters of my own sea of grief.
I saw the frown on your face reflect the thosands of lies I've told you and the tens of thousands of times i told you i loved you, in my head and otherwise, and it was always returned by you, yet i still know it isnt the same when i look in your deep eyes and feel them swallow me whole.
I choke on the words i want to confess but i cant because ill lose you forever and call me crazy cuz i am but that is not my goal for this long term lifetime that i must endure in solitude cuz i cant get up the guts to take charge for once and admit the truth to us all.
So pardon me if i lie to your face all the time i really dont mean to its just that you scare me so much and as much as i want to come clean like you are with the rain on your face and in your hands my hands are empty and swollen with shame so please forgive me if i get tears on your shirt.